Trainwreck Poker

I love home games. Everything starts on level and deteriorates from there. And there's nothing like deteriorating with people you know really well - to the point where the burps are rated and the guys aren't stifling the farts anymore. I even wore my special shirt. (back/front)



It's a bit hard to read since I've washed it often, but John's Poker System offers sound advice for the bargain price of only $2.99. Always follow a hunch, kids.

WWRS - At our tournaments, Ron contributes pearl after pearl of wordsmithery (eg. Are you done cryin' like a rat eating an onion?)

We haven't had a home game in months so we had high attendance on Saturday. And these people don't come empty-handed. You've got your coolers. And six packs. Bags of chips. The usual artery cloggers. I sorta wish Code Name: Lucious had come empty-handed.


I also wish Code Name: Mad Scientist had come empty handed instead of making me drink something foul called Twisted Tea. Twisted Tea - that I kept calling Texas Tea.

Alice: Yeah, I guess that's the Beverly Hillbillies.

Code Name: Plinko: Texas Tea is a penny slot. It goes like this: (proceeds to duplicate the bonus round sounds from Texas Tea slot machine)

Alice: You just failed the "When The Fun Stops" gambling pamphlet.

With so many people, we had three tables to start.


I was seated at this state-of-the-art poker table below. Take note of the sleek, felt top and buttery soft, padded leather railing.

I wasn't even that drunk when Code Name: Dunderhead eliminated me. That picture does not deceive. My AA did in fact lose to KQ suited.

We started a second tournament in which the deterioration was completed with the birth of Trainwreck Poker. Worst starting hand took the pot EVERY TIME. And then we drank some more and started screaming CHOOOO-CHOOOOO for every awesomely bad hand that won. Or if we just felt like yelling CHOOOO-CHOOOOO, which turned out to be every 30 seconds. And then you'd make a caboose joke. And if it didn't make any sense, that was OK because you could cover by yelling CHOOOO-CHOOOO again.

Trainwreck Poker apparently suits me since I took 2nd Place in that one. My theory is that annoying the competition made for successful game play. And by yelling CHOOOO-CHOOOOO, no one can tell if you're bluffing.

(This post written under the feeling of no sleep/cotton-headedness. Pole effing sana.)

(Pole = sorry)

(Sana = very)

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