Friday, June 20, 2008

Friday Randomness

Is it me or do you other chicks keep a razor in your car? I always discover my hairy knees when I'm driving. Hairy knees that I did a bad job on when shaving in the shower. So if I keep the razor in my car, I can take care of business without obsessing over it or having to pull into Walgreen's for an emergency razor. I also keep emergency dental floss in there too. Right next to The Club. It's like the trifecta of emergency supplies.

I'm a fan of good ol' Gillette Good News. No lube strips. No quadruple blades. Straight up cutting action. Really, what can you do to improve a razor blade? I'm not looking for pink and ergonomic.

And this is the question that haunts me with toothbrushes. I'm tired of toothbrush ads on TV. My God! If you haven't maximized the potential of a toothbrush at this point, give it up. Stick...bristles...the end.

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Chem-lawn came to take care of our yard today. We don't pay for the entire lawn because we couldn't afford that and food at the same time, but we get about the front acre and a bit done. Dude was loading the chemicals into a hand cart when we pulled up.

"Dude...where's your little motor-powered-fertilizer-vehicle you drive around on?"

"I'm the only one who doesn't have one."

"Your time here is gonna suck then."

When he left, he put the bill on our front door handle, which jiggled and got our attention. As we looked over through the glass, we got a full-on view of him hitching his pants up past his EXPOSED underwear with a BULLSEYE on his butt. BoyChild almost choked on his laughter. It was nice to have a shared moment of hilarity like that.

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I've lived in a lot of places, one of which was Oklahoma. You expect tornadoes in Oklahoma.

My old hometown of Savannah got pummeled by a tornado yesterday. As long as I've been around down there, we have hurricane warnings year after year and fortunately nothing ever hits. We were even spared by Sherman. But a FREAKIN' TORNADO?! WTF?

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Oh...and Bathtub Gangsta...watch your step..

V.Ice is gonna pop a cap in that belt buckle soon.
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For more randomness, you can click on Humor-Blogs.

18 Comments :

♥Shally said...

My husband uses those, and they are great! I had to use his once, and have never gone back to the Daisy's.

Hey It's Di said...

I'm so glad to know that I'm not the only one with the vehicle razor. Why is it that we always miss some on our knees? I always am surprised when I find some REALLY long stray hair on my leg. Like I've missed that spot for years or something:)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I'm a mster of the art of the shaven knee. My problem area ia the soft spot on the side of the ankle. Yeah, I can't get the hair shaved clear out of there for some reason.

I have Chewbacca ankles. :)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Okay, you know your heat rash offer? Well, this is funny because I bought something at the Dollar Store for you like a month ago that I never got around to sending. As soon as I saw this stuff languishing on the dollar store shelf I knew I had to buy it for you.

You see the power you have? You are hypnotizing Internet strangers into buying stuff for you at the Dollar Store. Amazing!

Alice said...

Shally - Woo hoo! I thought I was alone. I've tried those others when I end up at someone else's house and razorless, but they just don't seem as good.

Di - Thanks again for the award! I need to figure out who to pass it on to. And I know what you mean about finding an inch long hair. Whaaa?? How have I NOT seen that?

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I kid you not about this...... my mom keeps tweezers in her truck cup holder, her purse, her glove compartment, and in the side door of her truck for emergency chin hair plucking while she's stuck in traffic or waiting somewhere.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Toothbrush ads I can handle. I'm sick of seeing women shake around in white pants while extolling the virtues of their name brand maxi pad.

As if they're better than me and my Dollar Store Julie pads. Whatev!

Cassie said...

I've never thought of keep a razor in my car, but now I think I'll have to start. I do keep tweezers in there though. People have probably laughed at me tweezing my eyebrows at stoplights before.

Alice said...

Elastic & Cassie - I don't know HOW I forgot about my tweezers since I am on a constant quest for the most perfect pair. I HAD the perfect pair and then I lost them or the kid's got ahold of them. *sadness* The kids ruint the alignment on another pair of mine and I was livid.

Elastic - The solution to the pads/tampons thing is to get a hysterectomy. I highly recommend as it has significantly cut down on costs in that area. Your mystery gift is on the way today!

JD at I Do Things said...

Bwah! "Bristles. Stick. The end." Or whatever the exact quote was. I agree. If a toothbrush fits into my mouth and can move toothpaste around on my teeth with brushlike motions, I'm good.

It never occurred to me to carry around a razor, but then I'm known for my scarred legs, so travel-shaving is probably not an option for me.

JD at I Do Things

Jan Ross said...

And THIS is why I love blogs. I TOTALLY have the hairy knees issue in the car. It's always when you get in the bright sunlight, you have on cute shorts and are good to go and then - you see the hairy knees. I am going to immediately go put a razor in my car. And tweezers!! Genius!! I can only see those 2 or 3 long hairs on my chin in the sunlight. And, seriously. Do those frakin' things grow overnight or what?

Kelly said...

Dude Vanilla Ice..thats so funny..that doll is awesome..I would pay to see him and BathTub Gangsta brawl..haha
I was in love with that wannabe rapper when I was a kid..I mean who doesn't love "Ice Ice Baby?!" Yeah, thats funny him and LL Cool J were my dawgs yo. I had a life size poster of LL on my wall at the ripe ol' age of 8.

Alice said...

JD - The first time I ever shaved my legs I took off half the skin on my shin. So nasty and bloody.

Mrs. Who - I KNOW! Love the inch long hairs that magically appear. And then I think, "Lord, I hope people I've been talking to haven't been staring at it!"

Kelly - V.Ice and Bathtub are totally going to have and East Coast vs. East Coast thing going.

Meg said...

I keep razors in my car too--and a makeup bag and nail file and scissors for cutting my bangs. It's all part of my "better grooming at red lights" plan.

Bee said...

I want that Ice doll! Or um, action figure.

Mary Witzl said...

My kids whip my tweezers every single time. I had the greatest pair and they disappeared. Bought another one, happened again. Now I'm tempted to slink up to their rooms and steal theirs. And I would, I swear -- if only the shock wouldn't kill me first.

I could never shave my knees in the car, though! I bow to your superior coordination.

Anonymous said...

I don't keep a razor in the car, but I do keep an emergency stash of deodorant. I don't know why, but I very frequently forget to apply before I leave the house. I take it as a sign of maturity that I've remembered to keep some in the car.

Unknown said...

We may have to change our saying from plumbers bum to landscapers bum...I can see the image and I am already trying to dispose of it.

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