Monday, May 12, 2008

Rainy Days and Footless Socks Always Get Me Down

Babycakes finally got fed up with our old coffee maker and decided a new one was the way to go for Mother’s Day. I was cool with the old one, even if it never shut off automatically. It meant I was guaranteed hot coffee at almost any time of the day unless I’d almost finished the pot in the morning, in which case I was guaranteed piping hot coffee sludge. I think he was also getting a little tired of my unDenny-waitress-like ability to get coffee from the carafe into my mug without dribbling onto the counter. So he killed a lot of birds with one stone by getting me this:

The card pretty much sums up my Mom-hood tough love attitude but it's missing a wooden spoon (or as I like to call it The Enforcer). And of course I received the much coveted box of Pokémon cards.

BoyChild and I entered our first local Pokémon tournament on Sunday afternoon for a little practice. A little practice in losing that is. This wasn’t our big Majestic Dawn tournament that we’re waiting for next weekend, but a play-your-own-deck tournament.

Most of you reading this don’t really know me, but I’ll fill you in – I am almost COMPLETELY controlled by my competitive nature. Doesn’t matter if it’s grades in school, games or sports. Well, I got a big ol’ taste of learning to lose gracefully and was glad to hear that at least the 8th grader that spanked me in the 2nd round was ranked in the top 40 players worldwide. I also learned that I need to get my ass back on eBay because I need better cards. Don’t think I didn’t pick up on more than a few deck improvements while I was playing. I taunted the 8th grader (taunting is an entirely acceptable tactic...if the judges don't witness it) with the possibility that he could be in my high school math class next year. I’m pretty sure he was scared. Or maybe that was pity. I get those looks confused.

I know that a few of my readers (those that adore my tales of yardwork) will be glad to hear that we’re in the middle of a deluge.

This should ensure that most of next week will be dedicated to yard maintenance adventure. I’m a bit concerned because I’ve got BoyChild’s birthday party in 5 days and GirlChild’s party is next week and if this rain forces the proceedings indoors – you’ll hear about it. Unless I'm dead. And then I'll get Babycakes to write about it.

Sue – I'd like to share a little allergy mocktail I call Benaquil. Notice how I combine the two simple ingredients in my fine Lenox crystal - the only fine thing I own.

Other bizarreness – I’m participating in an exciting sock swap over at the Infidel Place. A post of hers mentioned eBay so I decided to check it out for my secret sock swapee. What I found I couldn't keep to myself, so if you’re interested in the tops of a pair of Star Wars socks – better head on over quick before I outbid you !!!

(This is 100% true and accurate – you may have thought you misread my previous sentence, but the bottoms of these socks have been cut off.) Come's only 99 cents. How can you afford NOT to buy these?! I'm seriously considering this purchase for the swap - so be warned! And swapee - beware!
Humor-Blogs will knock your half-socks off!


Bee said...

I'm planning my sister's baby shower (outdoors) this Saturday and am hoping the rain stays away. If not you and I should do a a suicide pact.

Those socks look wrong just wrong.

But funny!

Tracy said...

Why would someone do that to those poor poor socks? It's as if they've been neutered. People are still telling them that they're socks but they just don't feel whole like they once did. So sad.

Meg said...

I'm not competitive or else those socks would so be mine. I wonder, do they have some with Venusar on them or Electabuzz or Charizard?

BTW, I'm #5 in Crude Humor. I am so not crude--it's just my titles.

You'd think I'd have something better to do than dropping by 2X in one day. I'm just putting off the inevitable elliptical machine upstairs. And you so entertain me!

Alice said...

Bee - I'm in for the suicide pact. It's soooo Heathers. And are you nervous that you might be the recipient of some really cool footless Star Wars socks?!?!?!

Tracy - Or they could be yours!!!!!

Meg - I'm not seeing your name on Elastic's list so if you want those socks, you'll need to outbid me for them! But you won't win. I always win. I'm like a silent predator on eBay. And if you do win - I'll just point my finger and laugh at you for spending that much money on some old cut up socks.

Sadly, I have not located any Pokemon socks yet.


I saw a girl selling her rainbow striped toe socks for 15.00 with the description that they were used.

The picture of the bottoms showed gigantic holes. :0

My favorite ebay auction of all time was a guy selling a Mason jar full of genuine authentic Tater Tot Casserole Farts.


I just spent 2 hours outside weeding so I don't get another pissy letter from the HOA. I just spent 2 hours weeding last week.

I hate the weeds this time of year. They're growing like weeds!!!!

Jeff said...

I don't actually like the 2 hour shut off feature of our new coffee maker. I miss having it hot no matter when I want it. And in the afternoon I would just add a little water to my cup to thin it back out again. Ahhh :-)

jennie said...

after days of encouraging (forcing) the kids to help me weed the garden, my son told me that he thought we should just cover it with boards so at least they'd have something to play with. I think that's kind of a bad sign isn't it? when a pile of boards is a better option than gardening with your mother?

Alice said...

Elastic - Good grief - did anyone bid on the Tater Tot Toots? I hope you ran a copy of that off for chuckles later on. And as for weeds - that's why I'm more in favor of grass than flower beds. Much less work in the weeding arena!

Jeff - I'm with you on the automatic shut off, but Babycakes is convinced the house is gonna burn one day because of it.

Jennie - Whaddaya mean?!! A board can be tons of fun!! OK, really anything is more fun that being forced to weed with your mom. I know this from experience.

Jenn Thorson said...

Isn't a pair of socks, with no place to put one's foot called...

... Legwarmers?

And ya know, Alice, legwarmers are all "in" and stylish right now, too.

I bet vintage Star Wars legwarmers-formerly-known-as-socks ones would be even MORE so. :)

Sue said...

Star Wars footless socks- LMAO. Seriously, someone should start a blog of just hilarious ebay items. I would visit daily.

Alice said...

Jenn - Legwarmers! It was so obvious. I'm definitely getting them now.

Sue - I need to find an old EBay item I ran off along time ago for a worktable. You'll wet yourself.

Mary Witzl said...

Yes, those are leg warmers! Here in Scotland, leg-warmers are pretty much de riguer and not a fashion statement per se.

I'm competitive too, though not for things like math or games, which I am sadly awful at. I'm betting that my collection of footless socks, socks without partners, and socks with undarnable holes beats anyone's. Two years ago I packed them all into a long, thin tube of fabric and made a draft-stopper for the door that weighs a couple of pounds. Now, I could probably make a new one and the collection just keeps growing.

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