Mama Bear

Mama Bear got to emerge from the cave today. We've got a 5th grader on the school bus who's been harassing BoyChild and his friend "R". Thuglet has taken a Nintendo DS game from "R" and claims if BoyChild doesn't hand over a Raichu Pokemon card, things are going to start being deleted from the game. Oh, and someone's gonna get punched.

BoyChild and I went on a little reconnaissance mission to find out where Thuglet lives. Turns out, it's in our neighborhood and right next door to someone I know. Luckily, her son "B" and friend were out in the yard - prime for grilling - and setting a sweatshirt alight with firecrackers. I pulled up as they were pouring water on the smoldering shirt.

"Hey B...who lives next door?"

" The L's. Thuglet....he's a devil-child.....and it's not firecrackers we're playing with...."

"Yeah....right....."

"What did Thuglet do? Huh...come on.....tell us....." (friend pours more water on shirt)

"Nothing you need to know about." (I eyeball the smoking shirt again.)

"You're not gonna tell my mom are you?"

(Thinking I don't want "B" to alert Thuglet....) "You keep your mouth shut and so will I." (We pull out.)

Apparently my Goodfella's-like line tickled BoyChild to no end. I'm sure he'll be using it in the future.

We called Thuglet's Mom and Mama Bear (using a carefully moderated voice) politely asked if Thuglet had "R"s game. I'm not sure what transpired after I hung up, but Thuglet's Mom forced him to call us back. We passed on "R"s phone number since it technically wasn't our game and now find out that Thuglet claims the game was returned. What can you do (aside from breaking and entering and searching the kid's room).

I appear to be more affected by all this than BoyChild. He was more intent on getting Obi Wan through some level on Lego Star Wars than listening to my bully speech. If Thuglet strikes, use the Force Boychild, use the Force.